Oh, that guilty feeling!
It is already June, and the Lioness (who is currently as big as a house) is now 30 weeks preggers. This second time around is somehow relatively easier than the first one..or at least I think. But due to age (gasp!) and lesser agility, I tire more easily.
In a way, I am feeling VERY guilty towards Lil Cub #2 (let's call him Adik for the time being). I feel that I am not being fair to Adik for a number of reasons:
1) I don't take care of myself as good as I did when I was with Lil Cub.
> I do not really look after what I eat, where I eat or when I eat. Gone are the days of my 'wajib' fish meals and daily dates.
> I do not exercise religiously. Apart from the weekly fit ball class, I don't even take the extra effort to walk in the park anymore.
2) I don't put in as much effort to equip Adik with enough spiritual supplements too. It is already the 3rd trimester and I haven;t even completed my rounds of regular surahs I used to recite monthly with Lil Cub.
3) I often get so worked up or upset with the people are work that I am almost certain that Adik is gonna be one garang fella!
4) I don't talk to Adik as often as I used to with the brother. Sometimes I feel like that I am putting too much time to ensure that Lil Cub doesn't feel sidelined with the pregnancy, I am spending even more time with him rather than taking my quiet time with Adik.
5) We even haven't finalised his name!!
I also feel that Buster is taking this pregnancy rather lightly and for granted. He puts only hald the effort (if it is even THAT much) of his previous efforts and time for Adik. I don't think he is all that excited to feel Adik moving or reading to him like he used to with Lil Cub. Maybe because he thinks I am tough enough this time around? Or is it because the novelty of it all has worn off? Sometimes I wonder if he is a at all disappointed that Adik isn't gonna be Daddy's girl? Of course it'll be so ideal to get a pair of cubs, especially when this Lioness LOVES to shop for pretty girly stuff. I mean those skirts and riboons, and cute blings. Don't even start to mention those cute shoes!! Oh, but I digress.
Okay, maybe I am overeacting on this. GLAM mom says it is perfectly normal to take the 2nd pregnancy easier and with less anticipation than the first. But is it fair for Adik?
Baby dearie, please know that Ibu loves you equally, even if I don't show it. I am a second child too, and although I have always regarded myself as independant and not the fave, I wanot you to know that you will NEVER be any less important that your abang. Iwill try my best to buck up this final few months, and I can't wait to see you in August!
In a way, I am feeling VERY guilty towards Lil Cub #2 (let's call him Adik for the time being). I feel that I am not being fair to Adik for a number of reasons:
1) I don't take care of myself as good as I did when I was with Lil Cub.
> I do not really look after what I eat, where I eat or when I eat. Gone are the days of my 'wajib' fish meals and daily dates.
> I do not exercise religiously. Apart from the weekly fit ball class, I don't even take the extra effort to walk in the park anymore.
2) I don't put in as much effort to equip Adik with enough spiritual supplements too. It is already the 3rd trimester and I haven;t even completed my rounds of regular surahs I used to recite monthly with Lil Cub.
3) I often get so worked up or upset with the people are work that I am almost certain that Adik is gonna be one garang fella!
4) I don't talk to Adik as often as I used to with the brother. Sometimes I feel like that I am putting too much time to ensure that Lil Cub doesn't feel sidelined with the pregnancy, I am spending even more time with him rather than taking my quiet time with Adik.
5) We even haven't finalised his name!!
I also feel that Buster is taking this pregnancy rather lightly and for granted. He puts only hald the effort (if it is even THAT much) of his previous efforts and time for Adik. I don't think he is all that excited to feel Adik moving or reading to him like he used to with Lil Cub. Maybe because he thinks I am tough enough this time around? Or is it because the novelty of it all has worn off? Sometimes I wonder if he is a at all disappointed that Adik isn't gonna be Daddy's girl? Of course it'll be so ideal to get a pair of cubs, especially when this Lioness LOVES to shop for pretty girly stuff. I mean those skirts and riboons, and cute blings. Don't even start to mention those cute shoes!! Oh, but I digress.
Okay, maybe I am overeacting on this. GLAM mom says it is perfectly normal to take the 2nd pregnancy easier and with less anticipation than the first. But is it fair for Adik?
Baby dearie, please know that Ibu loves you equally, even if I don't show it. I am a second child too, and although I have always regarded myself as independant and not the fave, I wanot you to know that you will NEVER be any less important that your abang. Iwill try my best to buck up this final few months, and I can't wait to see you in August!
posted by lion3ss | 4:28 PM
2 Comments:
:)
-OAA-
Adik also won't have his uncle T around... :(
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