Ramblings of the heart..
No one ever said life was a smooth ride. There are stops and bumps along the way, and the best we could do is take a deep breath, and put the car into gear again. No matter how hurtful. No matter how frustrating. No matter how tiring.
There are times when what you desire is not in line with what the person you share your life wants. He may agree with you to a certain extent, but the end results are of two different things. You may envision a home with just the two of you trying to start living together. He might see it as having a second home to sleep in. You may look forward to prepare dinner, no matter how tasteless it may be. But he might reckon eating at his home a better alternative, no matter how awkward the situation puts you in. You find paying the maids to do the ironing for workclothes is enough, while he sees it as a reason to keep carrying laundry back and forth. These..among other things.
You may sigh. You may shed a tear or two. You may even be tempted to vent. But you then realise that you are in this for better or worse. You realise that when it comes to this, no one else should be around except you and him. So instead, all you end up doing is take that slow drive home, and cry your heart out while listening to Barry Manilow.
The moment you reach home, you'd feel slightly better, and ready to face the bumps again. *Oh, and a round of laundry and scrubbing the toilet is always a good way to get your mind off things!* You step on the clutch, get into gear and slowly stepping on the accelerator again, hoping that the next bump would be easier.
And secretly wish that one day, he too knows how you really feel and realises that both you and him are in this 'building a new life' together.
There are times when what you desire is not in line with what the person you share your life wants. He may agree with you to a certain extent, but the end results are of two different things. You may envision a home with just the two of you trying to start living together. He might see it as having a second home to sleep in. You may look forward to prepare dinner, no matter how tasteless it may be. But he might reckon eating at his home a better alternative, no matter how awkward the situation puts you in. You find paying the maids to do the ironing for workclothes is enough, while he sees it as a reason to keep carrying laundry back and forth. These..among other things.
You may sigh. You may shed a tear or two. You may even be tempted to vent. But you then realise that you are in this for better or worse. You realise that when it comes to this, no one else should be around except you and him. So instead, all you end up doing is take that slow drive home, and cry your heart out while listening to Barry Manilow.
The moment you reach home, you'd feel slightly better, and ready to face the bumps again. *Oh, and a round of laundry and scrubbing the toilet is always a good way to get your mind off things!* You step on the clutch, get into gear and slowly stepping on the accelerator again, hoping that the next bump would be easier.
And secretly wish that one day, he too knows how you really feel and realises that both you and him are in this 'building a new life' together.
posted by lion3ss | 7:52 AM
6 Comments:
hang in there sweetie... things will get better, i promise. it's never easy to start a new life, even more difficult to do that with another person :).
i had my rough patches too (heck, i still do sometimes!!), but take it one step at a time k? after all, like you said there are MORE bumps to go over after this...
all the best.. and i'm sure buster loves you very much!! *wink*
Maybe it's the Barry Manilow songs yang buat you depress tak? :P
Hang in there, sweetie! It *is* tough, but you know, even if it's just u and buster in theory, in reality you both married into each others' families too... this includes being sucked in to any dysfunctional dynamics loh... ;-p One of Covvey's habits: "Seek first to understand, then to be understood" : have you and buster been communicating about how each other feels? From what I know of him it's not like he's going out of his way to get u depressed/sad, right? Talk, my dear... once things are out in the open they won't seem so bad anymore. hugggzzzzzzz!! *sipoh*
Sipoh & Leez: Thanks you two. Good advice, and shall keep it in mind. It's not that I didn't have a clue what I was stepping into, but sometimes a but of a vent works wonders.
Kimster: Maybe, kan? *hides BM cds under the bed*
I mean a bit..but pulak..
Yeah...it's definitely the Barry Manilow's CD.
Looks like you are doing your 'muhasabah diri' and self discovery on your own. Good for you sis. Keep it up and hang in there. Love is what matters and Buster is loaded with it. Soon you guys will be Karamjit Singh and Allen Oh....bumps and sharp corners is nothing since you are good driver and navigator.
-bro-
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